The Surprising Truth about Transitioning to Gray Hair
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The surprising truth about going gray? It’s about so much more than just hair.
It sounds so simple.
You wake up one day and decide to stop dyeing your hair. But we all know that it’s not that simple.
The transition to gray hair is not just about hair, but so much more.
Personally, from the moment I decided I was DONE dyeing my hair, I felt incredibly FREE!
Free from wasting my time and money on hiding my silver roots.. and also free from caring what society thought about my hair.
That feeling of liberation hasn’t diminished, even though I’ve been dye-free now for several years.
And that thrilling, liberating feeling has affected every area of my life, as it compelled me to question my other limiting beliefs and habits.
Honestly, if I’d known that would be the case, I probably would have looked forward to ditching the dye instead of fearing it.
I surveyed my fellow silver sisters on Instagram and Facebook; I asked them what surprised them the most about transitioning to gray hair, and what were the most unexpected side effects of going gray.
Here are their answers, grouped by theme:
FREEDOM / LIBERATION / SELF-ACCEPTANCE
“Never having to worry about roots showing again. I was amazed at how often that thought crossed my mind until I realized I was all one color now.”
“The sense of freedom/relief from the expense, time, making appointments, and the chemicals that coloring my hair required.”
“Like many women, the sense of freedom and empowerment. Being my authentic self. And I just love the uniqueness of everyone’s hair including my own. I just can’t wait to be fully transitioned. I just wish I could click my fingers and see my true self.”
“The freedom of not having to worry about dyeing my hair and planning around events and making sure my hair has fresh new dye.”
“This isn’t just a color hair thing. It’s so much more than that. It’s about courage, attitude, and self-love.”
“I’m surprised by how much I have not and do not give a flip about what others think. I am surprised I am not as vain about the grow out phase!”
“I used to freak out if I had to go out and my white roots were peeking out. Honestly today, I don’t even notice them anymore. I love them!”
“Oh that liberating feeling! It’s like saying F** You in so many ways!”
“I can say I really don’t give a poop about what other people think of me! That’s very freeing.”
“I finally feel like “ME!””
“Positive benefits include: saved $$$ and time, and a newfound sense of authenticity!”
EMOTIONS WE FEEL ABOUT GOING GRAY
“The emotional rollercoaster has surprised me. I’m usually someone who makes a decision and sticks with it, but I’ve vacillated fiercely over the last 2 months (early days in my grow out!) I am going to persevere though!”
“I’m surprised at how excited I am to see it finally all going silver now that I made the commitment. “
“Basically, I am surprised by the fact that although I hate it 99.9% of the time, I still stick to it. This is not really me. Sucking it up and waiting, but I’m doing both things, I’m learning something here.”
“I’m barely into this but now that I’ve made the definite decision it’s exciting to see what I’ll look like. You don’t get that every day, that there’s going to be something new about how you look.”
“I’ve been so surprised at how fun it feels!”
REBELLION / EMPOWERMENT
“It’s incredibly powerful to push back against society’s idea of what makes a woman look beautiful. I feel like I’m paving the way for my daughter and other women to allow themselves to just be who they are, naturally.”
“I moved overseas and was never happy with the way they dyed my hair here. So, after getting a great dye job and beautiful highlights last summer back in the US, I just knew I was done even trying over here.
When I told some of my Tunisian colleagues that I was going to stop dyeing my hair, they actually gasped out loud. That is not done here!
Anyway, 7 months in, and I am getting the most crap from men who ask me incredulously if my husband likes it! Which he does. At my last trim, my male hairdresser would not stop begging me to color it. Politely and firmly, no.
When I get back to the states for my one-month vacay, I’m gonna get
“I love the non-conformist element!”
“I’m surprised how empowering this is!
I was constantly hiding, fighting again ashamed or feeling inadequate when (the grays) showed… that’s such an impossible task.
And then, from the minute I made the decision, I did not hide it in any way, not once. I even have a brand new bottle of root touch-up that has gone unused. There is no point for me to use it, as I’m not hiding anymore!
Yes, it looks odd and uncomfortable sometimes, but strangely, I feel so much more confident by showing it all and “owning it” than I ever felt when my silvers were perfectly (or imperfectly, who am I kidding!) hidden.
I never thought I would feel this confident about it.”
THE SILVER SISTER COMMUNITY
“At first, I thought that I was the only one in the world who ever stopped dyeing their hair cold turkey. Then I found this amazing community of people doing pretty much the same thing and cheering each other on with messages of support, encouragement, and love.”
“The pro is definitely having found this amazing community, where together with achievements, vulnerable moments are shared. And in the
And I feel love and support when I’m not loving or supporting myself. And that doesn’t come in a box with a number on it.”
“The support of the silver sisterhood is amazing
“This amazing group of women all over Instagram leaving colored hair behind in their own ways is so inspiring!”
“I started by sewing hair bands to hide my roots. Some days later I found the silver sisters on Instagram. I never wore those headbands.”
WHAT MEN THINK ABOUT GRAY HAIR
“My biggest surprise is my husband.
He told me just the other day that he’s proud of me for owning the true me. He said, “You’re accepting yourself, your lifestyle, even your mistakes that
“Men don’t mind it!”
“I was surprised by my husband telling me if I dyed it again he’d be mad
“I get hit on all the time!”
“My husband does not like it and I’ve been feeling shame towards myself and my grey hair.”
“The most negative surprise I had is how many women have not supported this process. Men seem more accepting – or at least non-committal – but many women have been vocal about my so-called “stupidity.”
“My health got better!”
“The skin rash on my face diagnosed as rosacea and dermatitis went away❣️”
“What surprised me was I started to seriously take charge of my health – physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Setting healthy boundaries was life-changing, even more than going gray! I became committed to self-care. When I’m feeling good, I can be a better wife, mom, and friend. “
CONFIDENCE / SELF-ACCEPTANCE COMES WITH GOING GRAY
“Confidence and a feeling of presence in myself and the world. I also KonMari’d my whole damn apartment and cleaned out some friend baggage.”
“For me, it really really boosted my confidence in all aspects of life. Self-actualization!”
“I found “me.”
“I got a more kickass attitude, because if I am able to have such self-control and confidence… I can do anything.”
“The confidence and liberation you feel
“People listen to my opinion more.”
“For me, it was the speed at which this boosted my self-confidence in life and the unexpected amount of self-acceptance that came with it.
The decision to stop dyeing my hair had a knock on effect on other things. For example, I also stopped plucking my eyebrows.
It took a while to grow and I did wonder at times if people thought it looked weird but strangely I didn’t really care.
I seem to have rediscovered my clothes as well. I got rid of some I didn’t really like and just appreciate the ones I do love more. I actually don’t have that many but it doesn’t seem to bother me.
I do feel liberated on so many levels and I like the “new” me.”
“I feel so confident and bold!”
“How much more self-confidence I have. No longer thinking about if someone is noticing my roots. No roots to notice!”
“I thought I was just giving up the dye but in reality, I gave myself the gift of being the person God created me to be!”
“I’m at peace with growing older.”
“I feel my age, in a good way. I have always been taken for much younger. I know this is a benefit but I earned these years.”
“I realized that many, many women start getting gray hair in their 20s… and that we (meaning modern society) somehow INVENTED the idea that only old people have gray hair.“
“I feel authentic and like I am a good role model for natural aging for other women.”
“It’s a relief that I can accept how old I am and move on with it instead of feeling like I have to fight the clock.”
“I sometimes still wonder, does it make me look older?”
THE TRUTH: THE GRAY HAIR TRANSITION TAKES AWHILE
“The transition feels like a pregnancy. A very long one.”
“While I dyed I wanted my hair to grow slowly. Now I’d like it to grow some inches over night. Hurry up, sparkles!”
“My hair is growing too slowly…..I wish I was fully transitioned already!”
“I love not having to dye my hair every 2-3 wks but the long period to grow it all out completely (2yrs?) is trying at times. “
“I feel that they grow very slow! I want to see the final process!”
And of course, the gray hair transition is also about hair, as well!
GRAY HAIR TEXTURE AND HAIR HEALTH
“My hair feels so much healthier and has stopped falling out!”
“I’m only 5 months into the process and I’m really surprised that I have new growth and I’m losing fewer strands in the shower. My hair FEELS thicker!”
“For years I thought I had thin hair. Come to find out it was just damaged from all the chemicals. Now I have thick healthy hair and I don’t have to spend tons of money on expensive conditioners!”
“I have curls now!! Wash and flick! That’s it. My stylist was as shocked as I was. He says it’s from the grey hair being coarser. I had unmanageable waves before that just looked awkward.”
“My hair feels so much better than the dried up frizzy mess that it used to be.”
“My silvers are a bit less curly. I was kind of worried they’d be kinkier, since I’ve had a lot of natural curl since I was about 13. It’s like my whole head of hair is more smooth curl and more relaxed.”
“I used to dye my hair every 4 weeks. I started getting a receding hairline and a lot of fall out. I’m 9 months in and have a lot of new growth, less fallout and my forehead has gotten smaller.”
“The texture at my nape either needs tons of moisture worn wavy or blasted to smooth. The rest of my hair is silky.”
“I’m amazed by the softness and texture of my natural hair!”
“My hair dries faster!”
“How soft my new growth is and how I sprouted all this surprising new growth.”
“My hair is the same texture it was pre-dye – not coarse or wiry at all!”
“My hair is shiny and healthy.”
“My super straight hair turned curly.”
“My hair has stopped falling out, when I thought I was losing it permanently.”
“I *thought* getting highlights on dark hair would help soften the demarcation and they really messed up my hair. It’s going to take a while to grow out and I wish I had just let the grey grow in after seeing so many gorgeous inspiring women grow our naturally. If I knew then what I know now.”
“I am so surprised at how healthy my hair is now, and only 3 months after I stopped dyeing my hair. I battled frizzy hair and gray roots for years. I missed my pre-dyed hair texture terribly, but I honestly thought that the awful texture of my hair was because there was gray hair under the dye.
I mistakenly thought that dyeing was somehow helping my hair look better, but it actually looked worse due to the dye! I am committed to this long journey and I’m excited to see what my true colors are!”
“I examined the structure of my hair and was surprised how rough the dyed part is. I was never aware of the damage my hair already had.”
“Surprised to find that even though we don’t
“Lots of baby sparkles that behave like toddlers (doing what they want and don’t care what I want them to do).”
THE WIDE RANGE OF HAIR COLORS
“I’m not as white as I thought, but a really cool very dark bluish steel grey with white stripes.?. Much darker than my dyed color.”
“I’m surprised at what parts are growing in salt and pepper and what is almost white
“Didn’t realize my natural hair color was so dark
“I still have a lot of brunette- not all gray. I didn’t even know what my natural color actually was.”
“I just love the silver color that’s coming in and my silver hair seems much healthier
“Surprised that I’m not as silver grey as I thought at the back of my head. My hairdresser had me fooled!!!”
“That I actually liked my white and silver hair. Also, I have a dark streak In front
“A radical change from, “OMG, there they are again! I need dye on my roots STAT!” To, “There they are! I wish I had MORE!”
“Wish I had more gray. I’m salt and pepper.”
“I’m surprised by my love for the white in the front of my hair. It’s definitely not as all-over grey as I thought.”
“I’m surprised at how many colors are in my natural hair!”
“I have ‘slices’ of natural white hair from root to tip and although I have fully transitioned and all natural it is not all one
“What has surprised me most about going gray is how crappy my dyed hair looked on me. What was I thinking?”
“My biggest challenge, because my skin tone is warm, is that colours which suit my skin, don’t suit my hair eg. yellow now looks terrible on me. I think that grey hair works really well for women who have a cool undertone (those who look good in cool greys, purples, magenta and black etc) but for those with a warm undertone the cool hair colour is a challenge.”
GRAY HAIR IS PRETTY!
“I’m surprised by how many people stop me to comment on it. I get comments from silver sisters, women that wish they had the courage to be silver sisters, and even more surprising all kinds of young people, male and female.”
“Mother Nature knows best and always gives the right tone of silver.”
“Surprised how much I love the silvers now and how soon my feelings changed from hatred to love.”
“I had no idea what was lurking under my fake hair color! So glad to be rid of brassy blonde hair.”
“I’m obsessed with looking at my new silver in different lights. It’s all so exciting.”
“People literally stop me in the street to tell me how much they love my hair.”
“I’m pleasantly surprised by all the positive comments I’ve been getting! Bonus
“I am surprised by how much I love it
“I get many more compliments on my hair as a silver than I ever did as a brunette.”
“I get stopped a lot just to be told how pretty my hair is and then it follows with an awesome conversation with really nice people.”
“I’m constantly amazed by the compliments I get from random strangers wanting to know where I get my color done. My response is always “Mother Nature Salon.”
“I’m surprised at how much I like it and surprised by how much earlier I decided to go natural. My plan was to wait until I retired but that’s 10 years or so away so I started not coloring earlier than I had planned.
I used to tell my husband, “If I’m ever in the hospital for a while and can’t dye my hair please color it for me because I don’t want anyone to see me with gray hair.” That was then. Now I’m asking him every few days, “Is it coming in more now?”
“I absolutely love my hair. Spent too much time and money dyeing my hair. It never looked right. The grey is very freeing and I get compliments on my hair all the time. I also have a great hairstylist that cuts my hair beautifully. I stopped coloring my hair 4 years ago. Not going back!”
“Very surprised by how much I liked my sparkles! I bought a ton of headbands thinking I’d want to hide my skunk stripe, but instead, I just went with it and felt excited and obsessed with watching it grow!”
“My teenager’s friends think her mom is hip for rocking the silver.”
“Surprised how I’m looking forward to the grays coming in, instead of dreading them.”
“My hair always looked too red or too blonde when I coloured it and I think now my colour suits me!”
“Surprised how much I love the grays now and how quickly my feelings changed from hatred to love.”
OK, ladies, how about you? Is this gray hair transition process about more than just hair for you?
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments! And check out my Gray Hair Before & After post if you get the chance. It’s fun to see everyone’s transformations!
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I initially went platinum blonde because I wanted a change. I got tired of it after a few years and wanted to go a little darker. I spent YEARS trying to get the perfect beige blonde from a box. It always ended up looking great for about a week then super brassy the rest of the time (a color I like to call “Blorange”). I stopped coloring about 2 years ago. Who knew that my natural color was, wait for it, beige blonde. All that time and expense and damaged hair for nothing. =D
I am 72 years young and I have been dyeing my hair for 15 years. I hated how seeing those white roots in my part stood out and ruled my life, not anymore! I started growing it out 10 months ago and I have loved seeing all the different patterns and different ways to style it! Like most of you I started with wearing the head bands to cover those white roots but that only lasted a few months and then young women started telling me they loved it…. what, someone must be paying them to make me feel better about growing it out, I thought. I switch my side parts all the time just for the advantage of seeing the most white and I am loving it! My hair is very long and I love the constrast of the white against the longer black hair…. Very sexy looking to me. It has definitely boosted my ego which I needed very badly! You can do it, too!
Im 1 1/2 inches out growth on my long pixie haircut I’m trying to grow out. I keep bouncing Back and forth whether to get a super short pixie again, or to experiment with toners. I’m set on doing this but trying to make it as easy as possible. I want a long shag in time. Any helpful hints for my situation? Thanks Rose
Personally, I’d go for the short pixie again to get the color out. Toners can set you back in your progress if they are applied incorrectly or by someone who is inexperienced using them. I’ve heard many stories of women having to start their entire transition over again because their natural growth got ruined by toners or highlights, etc.
My process took only about a year. I love it! It came it really white with some darker strands for dimension. I was afraid my coloring, medium skin tone and brown eyes wouldn’t “look right” but I get compliments all the time. My husband is crazy about it, he calls me his silver fox! So glad I stopped coloring after 30 years… I feel so free and authentic:)
That’s wonderful, Raylene!! 😍
I have read all the comments. I let my gray grow out when I was 40. I did waffle one time and color. I had co worker say “WOW, you look 10 years younger” Hum, let’s just say, I am still gray. It is about embracing the ageing process. Men do it all the time. I have always said, Ageing gracefully is the most beautiful thing.
Agreed, Jodie! I hate it when people say things like that. I feel like everyone is too free with their personal comments (even if they think they’re making a compliment).
Going cold turkey at the beginning of the pandemic was the best decision for me! Two years later, my hair is now shoulder length, shorter than it was prior, and I’m all different shades of grey. While I had issues for a while after making the decision to stop coloring my hair, I persevered with the help of my husband who was all in with my decision and I’m so happy I did. My temple greys were visible within two weeks after coloring…it was time. I don’t care if I look older because I am. Who the heck has natural dark hair at 69? It all became too much maintenance for me. Yes, it’s very liberating to be where I am now!!
I’m so glad, Arlene! Liberating i how I always describe it, too – I felt like a HUGE weight was taken off my shoulders when I ditched the dye. What a relief!
I stopped coloring my hair dark brown after the last time I ended up with sores on my scalp because of the chemicals. Luckily, my friend and I are retired hairstylists and together we were able to do ultra fine highlights in my hair to help my graying process. I’m 3 inches away from natural gray hair.
That’s great, Teresa!
I’m 39 and stopped dying my hair about 5 months ago. I knew my hair was completely white, and used to tell people so. They finally believe me. I still feel a little too young for all this white hair, like I’m missing out on my last few years of youth. But the feelings of empowerment and independence keep me going. I used to have to touch up my roots every 2-3 weeks and I would get crazy root-rage. Now I have a distinct line between my white hair and my dark brown but rarely get too upset about it. Sometimes i surprise myself in the mirror and think it might be good that this process takes a while. Gives us time to remember who we are.
Yes, Jen! You put it beautifully.
I am 55. Started the process a year ago (Feb 2020). Finally fully gray. It’s a very pretty salt and pepper look. Your article is spot on how I feel! I’m still getting used to it. Some days I am leary but most days I’m embracing it all!
I love the way you look, because of lockdown I’m on your path now I have not dyed my hair for almost 4 months now and I feel exactly what you are saying, may hair is shining and soft and I really like it I also like the transition mix of colors when I braid my hair I love how it looks and on another days I think I am crazy and I should blond it again….. but then I look closer and get in love of the way it looks again. I don’t know what my husband really thinks , he believes I’m am resting my hair because, because I can’t go out into the world right now but I am really not sure, my mom begged me to dye, also my sister I would really want your courage.
In my country you don’t use your natural color unless you are 90 haha haha….
Here is my transition story. I started going gray in my early 30’s and began coloring. At first at the salon, but it was so expensive I switched to the box mixes. The color never approximated the real super dark brunette I was naturally. The roots were getting whiter and whiter and one day I looked at my oldest brother whose hair was silky and almost white in his early 50’s. Wow, it looked awesome! Would mine look like that? My hubby and kids urged me to stop dyeing, but I wasn’t sure.
The real decision came when one of my teenage daughters was struggling with alopecia. How could I be a good role model and support her if I didn’t accept my natural hair just the way it was? As she was losing all of her hair, I just started letting my gray grow in and gave up the coloring. In the middle of her junior year, my girl cut off the small amount of her hair that remained, with a tight buzz cut that allowed her to rock her own look while waiting/hoping for some regrowth. She was done trying to hide the hair loss, just as so many of us hide our true selves with coloring. She was and still is beautiful and such an inspiration to me and others no matter what her hair looks like.
Now at age 51, I’ve let my wavy silver/gray grow past my shoulders and I get compliments all the time. Thankfully my daughter’s hair has grown back almost fully with the added benefit of the most amazing self-esteem and confidence from what she lived through, and how she conquered her fears and showed her true self.
Sue, thanks for sharing your story! I think you were a great role model for your daughter. I’m so glad her hair has mostly grown back and that she grew into such a confident young woman! It’s amazing how big of a deal hair is in our lives, and how accepting our natural hair can help us accept and appreciate other aspects of our true selves as well!
All of these stories has given me courage to go grey. I always said when I turn 60 I wanted to get tattoo and stop dying my hair. Well I turned 60 in January
Thanks ? finally with this pandemic I continue to challenge myself of accept ing my gray hair and looking at it as a sign of wisdom and light.Good to know there are people who support this transition. Thanks and God bless!
Glad I found you. Can’t go to hairdresser now…so thought this would be a good time to give getting to my natural color a try.
good luck – it’s the perfect time to go gray!
I’m suprised by how the white hair makes my skin look healthier! I thought going white would make my pale skin look washed out, but it’s quite the opposite.
I was born with black hair, but had to start colouring my hair in my early thirties. My mother and grandmother had beautiful white hair and I hoped I would be the same. I took the plunge to stop colouring my hair in my mid 50’s. I totally agree with other comments about the feeling of freedom and doing what I wanted for a change. My husband hates it, but I don’t care, this time it’s about ME and I love it. I really feel it is my way of sticking my finger up at what society expects of women. I’ve never had so many comments on the colour of my hair since going white/silver. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. I missed out on the lovely shades of grey.
I am 65 years old and have started my transition, I’m 2 months in! People always tell me I look good for my age, so naturally I’m afraid it will make me look older! I really am more determined to do this after reading your article. Wish me luck! Thanks!
Good luck! You’ll enjoy it, I’m sure!
Good Luck…I’m 64 and starting my journey. Vickie
I’m 65 next month and am 2 months in and feeling so much happier, I used to worry about my roots showing but although I don’t like what I see in the mirror I know it’s another day nearer going grey and I’m getting excited
I just made up my mind about allowing my grays to grow out naturally. I’m a little scared since the last time I tried it (pandemic lockdown), my 6yr old son, at the time, started to cry because he thought I was getting old and going to die soon. I’m 42 and have been dying my grays since my early 30s, but I am so over it! I’m ready to embrace the hair I was born to have and am so grateful for all the ladies who wrote about their experiences. you have all motivated me!
wonderful, Monica! My son had the same issue – I just reassured him that I’ve had gray hair since i was a teenager, so it has nothing to do with old age or dying. Best of luck to you!
Hi everybody . I am 63 years old with very dark brown hair m. I recently retired and I’m just so sick of coloring my hair and seeing the silver roots pop out in two weeks! My last salon dye job was in January. March and April I used a semi Permanent hair color from a box at home that washes out and 14 washes.So here I go! I’m very excited to be on this journey. And I am also happy for all the support I find online with you lovely ladies!
I have been wanting to stop coloring my hair for a long time, I have finally took the plunge. I have just started showing the grays on top. I have fought with this decision because I felt doing this would make me look older. I know it’s crazy but sometimes it’s hard to come to terms that our body and physical appearance change as we get older. But I am learning that doesn’t mean anything except a new chapter of my life. So look out world here comes the grey!!
For the first 4 months, when I felt my roots looked like I was just negligent, I used a spray on color….just at my part and on my crown. Once I was an inch into my transformation, I felt people would recognize that I was a woman on a mission! It took a year and 4 months to complete the transition. I assumed my hair would be totally white, but I’m delighted with the dark streaks here and there. I love it!
💗 it! “Look out world, here comes the grey!”🤗
I’m feeling the love and support in all the comments, which is greatly appreciated. My daughter wants me to wait a few more years to transition and my grandsons (6 and 9) don’t care for the out growth at all, and aren’t afraid to tell me so. But while I’m drying my hair and see the way the white and salt and pepper mix is framing my face I feel excited and believe it’s totally unique, it’s the way it should be. I feel free and giggle just a little and can’t wait for the transition to be completed. I’m only 4 months into it so I have sometime to go, but I’ll just keep giggling and hanging out with the Silver Sisters
👍🏼💖. Reminds me of the saying, Smile, it makes people wonder what you’re up to!
My grandkids were the same way! They would see a white hair and freak out. But one day I pushed my hair back and my grandson saw my white roots! He commented and I said,”yes, that’s my real hair color “. He followed with “You dye your hair?” Me:”yes, I have for thirty years!” Him:”we’ll you need to let it be the color it’s supposed to be, you’d look better.” My granddaughter followed up with “Grammie, you need to wash all that brown out of your hair!” (If only it were that easy!) I began my journey and they love my new, white hair!
I stopped coloring my hair 8 years ago at 49. It came through perfectly white. People felt the need to comment both positive and negative. 4 years ago someone thought I was my 50 yr old sister’s mother, at work I was not invited to join an important initiative because the lead thought I was retiring…I started coloring it again. I am now starting the journey back to white. I have more confidence now and the full support of my husband. Bring it on.
I’m sorry that happened at work – how frustrating! Good luck on this go-round. Between the support and the confidence, you’ve got this!
I am 56 years old and two months ago I decided to let my natural hair grow. It was a mission for me to color my hair every two weeks and it was dry and thing and it was also coming out a lot. I cut my hair short and is healthy now and stop falling. I still have my doubts when I see myself in the mirror and I see myself older but I love the salt and pepper color and I will let it grow. I wish it can be faster.
As a guy it was easy for me, even though I would get the comments, I was getting old and I would reply if it turns gray/silver, it means I am not going bald. And honestly the bad dye jobs that left a woman’s hair looking fried was never attractive. The harsh chemicals not only fry your hair, but are known carcinogens and women paid hundreds of dollars to get it done. And the guys who used the men’s version looking like they had shoe polish on their head, downright goofy looking. Silver hair with the different shades adds character and seeing the shine in long natural silver strands I think is stunning. I have a friend who has hair to her hips that I trim for her as she doesn’t trust the scissor happy stylists tell her she is too old for long hair. I know a number of ladies that have been told that rubbish. I know short hair and coloring is a money maker for salons, but women who see through that high pressure sales pitch, not only have more beautiful hair, it is kinder to their wallets. The added benefit of the long hair is the multitude of styling options of different braids, updos and variations. Not just one frumpy short helmet haircut. So I am not surprised that the silver haired ladies are getting compliments. When I see a lady that has lovely silver locks, I compliment them on their wise choice to not be a Slave to a foolish notion. Why not have a nice word for someone?
Thanks for your insights, Charlie! It’s so nice to hear a man’s point of view! I personally love long silver hair.
I hope those outdated notions of being “too old” for long hair (and other things) die away soon..
My husband is the one who asked me to let the gray come out! He loves my gray!! I have salt and pepper hair which is strange because I had blonde hair before I started dying it. I tried all different colors and never found a color I truly loved. I’m still not crazy about my gray but my husband loves it and that’s good enough for me!! I’ve been growing it out for almost 2 years now and it’s about half way there, my hair goes to the middle of my back. I won’t cut it shorter but I do keep it trimmed. Going gray is a hard choice for most women, including me, but once the decision is made stick to it!! My niece went all grey in her mid 30’s!! More power to her and all the others out there!!
Charlie, I am transitioning to gray, and I am happy about that. The only thing you said which stung was your negative reference to short hair. I have had a pixie cut off and on over my entire life…not frumpy at all. I currently have shoulder length hair, but I feel a shorter cut on the horizon. It is not my stylist’s decision…it is mine!
SO Appreciate your thoughtful insights and encouragement, Charlie! I get very discouraged when I see ladies I’ve been following with a long hair transition, “Go for the BIG CHOP” (after all it’s ONLY HAIR), as in shoulder length or a bob or a pixie, because they’re tired of waiting. I like my hair long for all the reasons you noted, and my husband does too.
You’re all so brave and positive, but I’m at the other end. I hate it. For me it’s depressing and I don’t look like my self anymore. My hair is fine and thin, it was also coming out in handfuls so I bit the bullet and stopped the coloring. I’ve gone from very dark rich brown, to ice white, no greys, pure white. I’m 52 and decided white would be better than bald, but to be honest its been really hard.
I’m sorry to hear that, Tam! Is going back to dyeing no longer an option due to the hair loss? If you don’t like your white hair, there could be other ways to handle it (if you don’t want to dye), like wigs or hairpieces (buns, etc.?) . Monique Parent has all white hair and she does some fun things with hers. You can find her videos on YouTube. Hope that helps!
I’ve been grey for 4 years now..I’m wanting my hair more platinum than silver grey. Any tips on what I can do to get it brighter with a platinum shade..
Hi, Diana = you should check out Monique Parent’s videos on YouTube. She sometimes uses products like Manic Panic to make her hair whiter or more platinum. She’s got a ton of great tips!
‘Alias’ here!! Not putting my husband in a spot by revealing my name on FBk, where you’ll often find me!
After being fully ‘real’ color for about 9 months, I’m coming up against a slightly strange problem.
My husband colors his hair (well, I do it for him…) because he feels that in the professional work place he needs to not look his age (69+), to keep up with the younger ones !! He’s extremely fit, slim, very tall, and sexy (a term that makes him wince! 😉 ) and is very highly thought of in his profession. However, I am sure his colleagues have worked it out by now, and I would LOVE him to go ‘natural’, as I think he’ll be pure white…stunning! (He won’t listen to me, but the darkness of his color is showing up a little thinning at the crown….) Add to this, we get some WEIRD looks when we’re out together! He insists on holding my hand (this has gone on for nearly 50 years!!) and I wonder if the MEN who stare are thinking he’s a toyboy!!! Any ideas would be very welcome…… This is serious, Silver Sisters. PS Despite initial reservations, he now loves my hair!
I’m 59 and started transitioning to gray hair like 8 months ago ………my hair is so many different colors and extremely long ………it used to bother me having to dye every 3-5 weeks and I was buying 3 boxes of hair color each time . It’s easier now and I’m glad I quit !! Still afraid to get a short haircut though lol
I’m 43 with many shades of grey in my mop, I stopped colouring 10yrs back. Every time I visit a new salon they compliment me on my Natural hair and many women have told me it looks elegant and they’d try it too. I absolutely love my grey hair.
It sounds beautiful!!
I’m 10 months with no dying. Not hard all…I was getting blind to match gray…only colored about every 5 months so there was always lots of gray anyway, so I said no more. Shoulder length hair so it will be couple years…but I’m enjoying the Journey! I’m 59 and a half…like the kids say!
Thank you for helping me find the courage to let my silvers grow out. I can totally relate to the discussion about the disconnect between colors that flatter the skin (warm tones) and colors that flatter the hair (cool tones). It’s a real issue for us Spring and Autumn types.
You’re welcome! I’m going to do a post soon for women with warmer-toned skin. It’s hard to find info!
I stopped coloring my hair July 2014, cut off all the colored ends May 2015, two weeks prior to my daughter’s graduation. It took a few weeks for me to feel I’d done the right thing. Then my aunt (3 yrs older than me) told me I’d inspired her to go natural. My mom said she’d never do it….6 months later she was growing hers out! The three of us are fully transitioned and no two alike, my mom’s hair is much darker and my aunt’s is much whiter. We’re all beautiful! Each of us gets multitudes of compliments from all sorts of people. I’m so glad to be gray!
That’s wonderful, Jennifer! It’s great that you inspired your family!
I love gray hair – it’s so unique!
Ben de boyamaktan ve boyaya para vermekten yoruldum . Bir kez boyayınca bitmiyor ki .. İnsanlar da biraz Beyaz gördü mü dip boyan gelmiş diyor. İnsanları memnun etmek zor onlar için para harcamak istemiyorum.. 2 yıldır düşünüyordum çok araştırdım sonunda silversisters grubunu gördüm.Oh dedim benim gibi düşünen insanlar varmış.. Arkadaşlarım bana ak saçlı diyor şimdi evet diyorum gülüyorum..?? Yaşlı görünüyorsun diyorlar gülüyorum.. Benim saç boyamamayı bir işten kurtulmaya benzetiyorum.Ayrıca saçlarım gürleşiyor 4 ay oldu .Daha hızlı uzamasını tercih ederdim bazen sıkılıyorum ama sizi görünce rahatlıyorum.Paralel düşündüğüm insanların olduğunu bilmek güzel.Çevremde eşim be kardeşim destek veriyor.Ama kayınannem annem ve diğerleri baskı yapmaya devam ediyor
Agreed! The idea of dyeing your hair for the rest of your life is daunting – I’m so glad to be done with that. Glad you are enjoying the blog!
I became salt and pepper in my 30’s. My hair dresser encouraged me to color to highlight the grays, said it would look nice. It did but wasn’t my thing. Then as I got “older” around 59 I started coloring it a soft black to match the hair I was adding to get the two strand twist look. Now at 62.5 I decided no more coloring. Recently I’ve been guided to this group with pictures of sooooo many others rocking their gray. Their pictures have been inspiring!!! I’m tired of waiting for it to grow out and since my hair grows pretty fast I’m ready to rock a short fro until it grows out more. Thanks ladies for having the courage to rock your gray!!!
Your hair sounds gorgeous, Desiree!
I loved reading all these comments! I recently decided to stop using henna on my reddish brown hair. I knew there was some gray in there and I was afraid it wouldn’t suit my pale warm coloring. But I started to realize the orange highlights looked ridiculous and I was not really matching my original hair color. I’m too months from my last henna and this past weekend did a henna removal process. It got rid of the orange, mostly, and made my hair darker in places. It is interesting to see where the gray is going to come in. I may get a couple of big streaks, which I think is fantastic! Thanks so much for this blog and your YouTube videos, I am learning so much!
Susan, I’m so glad that worked out so well for you! So glad you are enjoying the blog & videos!