How Going Gray Gave Me the Hair of My Dreams: Nicole’s Story

Welcome to another inspiring Silver Hair Transition Story! Today, Nicole B. shares her powerful journey from struggling to fit in to embracing her naturally silver hair at age 55. Nicole lives in San Diego, California, and is putting the final touches on her upcoming book “My Journey to Long Hair: Tips and Tricks I Wish I Had Learned 30 Years Ago!”

No kid wants to stand out and be different in school, or anywhere else. That’s natural, and I was no exception.

Unfortunately, having been blind since birth, blending in wasn’t an option for me.

I wasn’t happy to be seen in public school with Braille books, a loud clunky Braille writer, a cane, or a resource teacher who seemed like my mommy following me around. The only thing I would have considered worse would be to go to a school for the blind.

To add insult to injury, my mother insisted I looked better with an ugly short haircut. All of these things were a curse then, but would turn out to be a back-handed blessing in the end.

I didn’t feel pretty or feminine with short hair. People really did mistake me for a boy.

My mother thought this cut framed my round face better and gave my fine hair more volume. She always emphasized how we live in a sighted world and the importance of maintaining a nice outward appearance.

She picked out beautiful clothes for me—something I still trust her with to this day. But I hated that haircut.

The only time I found it livable was when she allowed me to start getting highlights for my sixteenth birthday. I wanted beautiful pale blonde hair like my friend Angela’s, and I wanted it long.

I didn’t realize then that bleached blonde and very long hair don’t quite go together.

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The Start of My Hair Journey

I wore that same ugly cut until I graduated from high school. Then I was done with it.

I was going to get the long hair of my dreams—beautiful, pale blonde hair. I highlighted and got trims every six to eight weeks, as my stylist insisted I must do to grow long hair.

But despite my efforts, I maintained shoulder-length hair for years.

I didn’t realize I was doing everything wrong until I joined a Facebook group called the Long Hair Community Meeting Place in late 2014. That’s when I learned bleach was the main culprit that stunted my hair growth.

I soon decided to ditch the dye and let my silver shine through—for the first of several attempts.

Looking back, I wasn’t ready yet. I got pressure from others to go back to coloring, and in 2017, I caved. I tried again in 2021 for a short time, but once again returned to the salon.

Why I Decided to Go Gray

Two Rapunzels with stunning hair finally inspired me to take the plunge for good.

First was Anna, The Pretty Shepherd on YouTube, who has beautiful knee-length hair. She got her first silver strand at thirteen and never dyed it. Now in her thirties, she has incredibly healthy hair.

I’ve been seeing her for deep conditioning treatments and trims since 2017. I live in San Diego, so it’s a several-hour trip, but worth it. When I can’t visit, I keep in touch.

In January 2024, I had a virtual consultation with Jessie about something unrelated to going silver, but she brought up the topic again. Over time, the idea of growing out my reddish-brown color started to sound appealing. I was ready for a change.

My last color appointment was March 27, 2024. I asked my colorist (not Jessie) to blend the color more subtly.

I was still half-hearted about it, but figured I could always return to coloring if I didn’t like it.

My colorist, who also grew out her silvers, was very supportive and said I’d look great with silver.

What ultimately sold me on silver was the overall health of my hair. Some people say their silver hair feels coarse, but I find the opposite. My hair feels like it did when I was young. Right now, it’s tailbone-length.

My Silver Hair Routine Today

I don’t need nearly as many trims because of how healthy my hair is—which has helped it grow. Before my last trim on February 15, my previous one was in May.

That’s nine months! That’s miraculous for my fine texture.

I only wash once a week. I don’t use any purple shampoo. I alternate between the George Michael line (which Jessie uses and sells) and the L’Occitane Repairing line (which the Pretty Shepherd uses). I recently tried L’Occitane and love it.

When it comes to makeup, I wear it when I feel like it. More often than not, I’m just too lazy to bother.

That’s why I love long hair—I can just throw it up with a beautiful wooden fork and go.

When I do wear makeup (about once a month), I’ve gone lighter with foundation and blush to suit my silver tone.

After my last color, I decided to go cold turkey. No bleach or peroxide. To me, that defeats the purpose of growing out color—which is about health.

From Shame to Confidence

In 2015, I founded a Facebook group called Long Hair Pioneers. It’s full of hair care tips and styling inspiration. It’s not just for silver sisters, but my co-admin has beautiful thigh-length silver hair. She’s a true inspiration.

I’m also editing my book, My Journey to Long Hair: Tips and Tricks I Wish I Knew Thirty Years Ago. It includes a chapter on my silver journey.

And I’m revamping my YouTube channel to educate and inspire others about good hair care. If growing extreme length is your goal, you might enjoy the group, book, and channel.

At 55 years old, I have the hair of my dreams.

The irony is that the Braille, the cane, the resource teacher, and even the short haircut didn’t let me blend in. But they taught me how to stand out.

That’s the back-handed blessing. I learned to be okay with standing out very early on, in situations I couldn’t control.

Final Thoughts: Advice for Silver Sisters

Today, I see the perks. I’m still blind, but I have choices I didn’t have growing up.

Heck, I even have the pale blonde I always wanted—just naturally silver instead. You can’t grow extremely long hair and use bleach, but going silver gave me another way.

I’ll leave you with these parting words of silver wisdom:

Being older is actually a great thing. I wish I had been this comfortable in my own skin back in school, but maybe that’s where I had to learn. Like blindness, which isn’t the tragedy people assume it is, aging is what you make of it.

If you’re not ready for silver yet, that’s okay. It took me several tries before I was. If you’re new to your journey, my advice is to stick it out and enjoy it.

Your hair will ultimately thank you!

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